Despite his successful books and programs, touch Özcan Akyol but hard saturated: “I can never enjoy things.”
That’s what he says in the podcast NU.nl In the car with.
For the NPO series The Cousins of Eus received the Deventer in 2018, with an honorable mention of the Silver debut competition jury. For NPO Radio 1-interviewprogramma Our Man in Deventer, the night Watch Award and the composite anthology of poet Lévi Weemoedt is very well sold.
But success doesn’t always have to Akyol: “Take that bundle of Weemoedt. There are nearly 80,000 copies sold, which is a unique achievement. But I’m fed up with anyone to quarrel, because the book is eight days not available. Otherwise we would have had the 100,000 touches. I am heartbroken and I become very cynical.”
In the car with Eus: ‘Children are sometimes out of the house by threats’
“We have at home, also never something to be celebrated’
According to the 34-year-old Akyol is often a form of onverzadigbaarheid cross: “There will appear a new edition of my debut novel Eus, the 25th or something, but still I am not happy. We have at home, also never something to be celebrated. It is never enough.”
In addition to that onverzadigbaarheid has Akyol, and every now and then to make with depression.
“People scare them if I talk about it. I have that consciously in a couple of years not done. But if someone asks, I will do that. I frequently suffer from depressive moods. That goes very far. So far sometimes, I am in my bed can’t come out and wonder what meaning life really has. Even if I have my children see. I feel guilty about it.”
Akyol stressed that that state of mind is not caused by temporary bursts. “It is a disease, eh? Suicide is number one cause of death in my family. I have a predisposition to depression. There’s something in my genes which I have a lot of thinking about life and a lot of feelings I have in certain cases. And the outcome is often not satisfactory.”