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James Van Der Beek opens up about his wife and 3 miscarriages: ‘We need a new word for’

James Van Der Beek opened up about his wife and 3 miscarriages on social media Monday.

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James Van Der Beek opens up about a painful experience he and his wife, Kimberly, have gone through.

In a recent Instagram post, the 41-year-old actor revealed that Kimberly has suffered three miscarriages. Van Der Beek and his wife share five children together, their youngest daughter Gwendolyn, who they welcomed in June.

The former Dawson ‘s Creek” star expressed that he does not like the term “miscarriage”, because it implies blame on the woman.

“Wanted to say a thing or two about miscarriages… we had three over the years (including the right for this little beauty),” Van Der Beek wrote next to a photo of the couple cradling Gwendolyn.

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“First of all — we have a new word for it. ‘Mass transport,’ in an insidious way, suggesting any blame for the mother, as if they dropped something, or not ‘carry.’ From what I have learned, in all but the most obvious, in extreme cases, it has nothing to do with anything the mother did or not. So let’s wipe all debt off the table, even before we start.”

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Wanted to say that a thing or two about miscarriages… we had three over the years (including the right for this little beauty). First, we need a new word for it. “Mass-transport”, in an insidious way, suggesting any blame for the mother, as if they dropped something, or not “carry.” From what I have learned, in all but the most obvious, in extreme cases, it has nothing to do with anything the mother did or not. So let’s wipe all debt off the table, even before we start. Second… it will tear you open like nothing else. It is painful and it is heartbreaking on a level deeper than you have ever experienced. So don’t judge your grief, or try to rationalize your way around. Let it flow in the waves, in which it comes, and let the rightful space. And then… once you’re able… try to recognize the beauty in how you put yourself back together again, differently than you were before. Some of the changes we make are proactive, what we create, because the universe has chosen us, but anyway, these changes are gifts. A lot of couples closer than ever before. Many parents realize a deeper desire to have a child than ever before. And many, many, many couples go on to have happy, healthy, beautiful babies after (and sometimes very quickly after that – you have been warned ?). I’ve heard a number of fantastic metaphysical explanations for them, mainly centering around the idea that these small souls to volunteer for this short trip in favor of the parents… but please share what you have given the peace, or hope along the way… Along with a new word for this experience. #miscarriage #WeNeedANewName #MoreCommonThanYouHearAbout @vanderkimberly

A post shared by James Van Der Beek (@vanderjames) on Sep 7, 2018 at 3:47pm PDT

“Second… it will crack you open if there is nothing else,” he continued. “It is painful and it is heartbreaking on a level deeper than you have ever experienced. So don’t judge your grief, or try to rationalize your way around. Let it flow in the waves, in which it comes, and let the rightful space. And then… once you’re able… try to recognize the beauty in how you put yourself back together again, differently than you were before.”

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Van Der Beek goes on to say that as devastating as the experience of a miscarriage is, sometimes, one is able to grow at the most unexpected moments as a result.

“Some of the changes we make are proactive, what we create, because the universe has chosen us, but anyway, these changes are gifts,” he wrote.

“A lot of couples closer than ever before. Many parents realize a deeper desire to have a child than ever before. And many, many, many couples go on to have happy, healthy, beautiful babies after (and sometimes very quickly after that — you have been warned).

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“I’ve heard a number of fantastic metaphysical explanations for them, mainly centering around the idea that these small souls to volunteer for this short trip in favor of the parents… but please share what you have given the peace, or hope along the way… Along with a new word for this experience. #miscarriage #WeNeedANewName #MoreCommonThanYouHearAbout @vanderkimberly.”

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